Commercial

Herro love people, Riley has let me be an author on this wonderful site, which, I may add, I am the top commenter on (riseofthechairs, don’t you dare take my position away lol). And since I am an extremely desperate, needy person, I’m going to leave a link for my blog riiiight here. Anyway, since apparently I’m supposed to entertain you fools… What? I’m sorry, did I read that correctly? What did these people ever do for me, why should I do something for them? Simple. Because. I. Want to. Anyway, here’s little story about an average person watching a commercial, versus a person with above average intelligence watching the same commercial.

CommercialHello, are you having a good day? Are you enjoying life?

Average person: Yeah I guess.

Intelligent person: Well, I suppose my day was rather better than usual, I got my paycheck, washed the car, and someone even complimented my hair, but my hair didn’t look particularly good at the time… Perhaps he were making fun of me? Ah well, overall, I’m doing fine

Commercial: “Well, did you know that no one’s life is as good as it could be, unless they have the happy-fier, it’s like a stress ball, but for sadness!”. Clip starts rolling. we walk in on a sad looking man “I-I-I’m  sooo saad…” *covers face, starts crying* a happy-fier pops up in front of him out of no where *Gasps, picks up ball curiously and starts squeezing it slowly* “What is this?” *Squeezing intensifies* “This is amazing! Somehow, I’m not sad anymore! In fact, I’m… Happy!” *Looks at feet, surprised, feet start to smoke* *feet shudder, man blasts off with happiness* Words pop up on screen Buy a happy-fier, It makes you Blast off with happiness! Batteriesnotincluded doesnotcuredeppressionanxiatyorsadnessingeneral sideaffecsmayincludebutarenotlimitedtonauseadizzinessheadachefeveranddeath

Average person: Cool! I’m gonna go out and buy one right now!

Intelligent person: What kind of false advertised rubbish is this? They are purposely targeting naive, weak minded people, and stealing their money! 

I hope you enjoyed my little skit

-Stacy

 

*None of this is meant to be taken offensively, if you do, well then, Fight me! But seriously, lighten up.

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JAMIE HAS BEEN HACKED HIHI HIHHIHIHIHIHIHI

 

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How To: Make a How To Post

Hello there, you are a reader, and I am finding out that an intro everyday that starts with Hello blah blah blah… But today I’m here to tell you how to how to!

Step 1: Come up with a concept! Like this one! Only not this one! ITS MINE!

Step 2: Write the Steps! Like these ones! Only not like these ones! THEIR MINE!

Step 3: Make sure to add an excerpt at the end to explain your crazy antics.

Thanks for reading, and yes, I feel your hate, but this post was a joke :D. There will be another one that’s not so weird later today. But remember, I won’t be able to keep up with this everyday schedule for a while because I only have 2 Gigabytes of data on my cellphone.

Continuation of Step 3: Like that one! Only not like that one! THAT ONE IS MINE!

How To: Increase Your Audience

Hello, im a piece of cheese and YOU’RE reading my post about how to increase your blog’s audience. 
1. Blog about a large range of subjects, but keep it balanced well. It makes sense that gaming bloggers and writing bloggers will have different people reading them right? So if you post about gaming and writing at the same time it’s logical to say that if you can find a way to write about lots of different things then you can greatly expand your amount of readers.

Hmm, do you know any blogger who posts about loads of subjects? Maybe they vary between gaming, his life, writing, and how-to’s? Yea not ringing a bell for me either..

2. The more people you follow, the more follow you people!! Wait what? But seriously, a good way to bring in new people is to explore the blogosphere! Look around your favorite topics for other blogs that talk about the same things you do. Thats how I found a load of you people!!

3. Post often and with quality! If you dont post at least once every two days, then your fans will lose interest! Causing them to unfollow (*^o^*)
Well that concludes our second official How-To post.. I hope you liked it. If not, i’ve got another Adventure To Fate! Battle Arena episode in production stages!

The Anniversary Of The Blog!

Hello, it’s Riley a.k.a dumcheese.

I started this blog a year ago with one purpose. To entertain people. From writing stories, to blogging my life, to video games, to reviews, to all of that.

This blog is one of the biggest parts of my life. It really means a lot to me and the fact that we just celebrated it’s first full year on WordPress is amazing. I never thought I’d ever have this many followers in one year. I want to thank all of my followers for giving me support, and always liking and commenting. I just want to thank all of you for that.

And to celebrate, I am going to write more comics, more stories, more contests, and more whatever you all want. I am thinking of starting to actually do more of blogging my life. Please reblog and comment on whether I should do more life blogging.

Please everyone comment one question you want to ask me. Whether it be about my life or just some weird chicken or the egg question. I’m open for the questions.

I will do an extra-super special video soon so stay tuned to my channel.

Your friend,
Riley Chapman

Who Likes This Blog? I Mean If You’re Reading This You Probably Do…

Do you like this blog, love this blog, or think it sucks… VOTE LOVE THIS BLOG! DO IT! NO STOP DRAGGING ME AWAY IM NOT INSANE…