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Shamelessly fighting in the view of the wars

A list of all the things I love:

 

Disney, in particular Disney Channel

Nintendo, always wearing flannel

Poems and Science

Beauty, not lice!

And also most definitely reading and WordPress

Music, but I digress

Whats most important to me

Is just blogging, can’t you see?

And although this isn’t up to my creative standard

I lost my library card (specifically the lanyard)

I can pull views

With this cheap ruse

So forgive me, the next real post is Monday

I hope you enjoyed my last real post, right here you can find it

So goodbye and now I have realized, I stole Riley’s idea right under his eyes.

So as I am legally required to disclose:

Sorry!

 

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AMAZING ITEMS!!? **DIY Edition**

Hello, and welcome to BlonDIY, the DIY channel dedicated to finding amazing items that already exist and making a post about it myself, hence the DIY part.

1.

First up, we have an item that could possible be the cure of all illnesses. A bubble wrap calendar.

Bubble Wrap Calendar 2017

Pros: Imagine for me a bad day, a flunked test, a burnt dinner, a stubbed toe. You fall right into bed and toss and turn all night before waking up at the crack of dawn for a job interview you know you’ll fail. but as you walk out of your bedroom, you notice your bubble wrap calendar. As you pop the bubble for the date, all your troubles melt away.

Cons: I would probably get so overjoyed and pop the entire month/year/millennia.

It is a simple but ingenious tool. Kind of like a chair or a reversible tie.

It is $10.99 here, and in my eyes well worth it.

2.

The second item is something everyone needs, except for the regular people who finish a bag of chips instantly because there is mostly air in those bags.

Introducing the chip bag resealer!

Pros: If you are a psychopath without even a gram of an appetite, this product is perfect for you. Or more practically if you have eaten several bags and have very poorly misjudged your chip fullness level, this can be useful. Also if you bought a huge bag of chips and only ate some

Cons: From what I see, you need to refill the tape used to seal it, so that might be an inconvenience.

A 2-pack is $12.57 and it might be worth it for parties or just after a big lunch.

3.

Now we have woken up, popped our calendar, had a great lunch and saved our leftover chips for the bus ride home.

But now we are in 4th period, and we need to write our notes because writing notes have more retention than typing notes. That is a fact and we recognize it because it helps us prosper. But we need a pencil.

Without further ado, the giant pencil!

Really Big Pencils (15") - Colors may Vary

The pencil only wears down with time, and it makes sense to start with a huge pencil and over the course of the year whittle it down to what puny humans call a ‘regular’ pencil.

Pros: This pencil is so amazing, and nothing really adds to this.

Cons: N/A

Personally I believe this pencil is so amazing that I would pay any price, but they are leaving money on the table big time as 1 is only $5.67 here. So I would recommend scalping and selling on ebay ASAP.

And guess what, you can scalp yourself and do your own DIY project!

That is all for the BlonDIY BlonDAY but I hope you enjoyed if you do please like, if we could pass 1 like that would be AMAZING, and until next time I hope you liked this post and I’ll see you in the next episode.

As I ‘DIY’ every time I write a post:

*insert outro crappy Creative Commons dubstep here*

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Commercial

Herro love people, Riley has let me be an author on this wonderful site, which, I may add, I am the top commenter on (riseofthechairs, don’t you dare take my position away lol). And since I am an extremely desperate, needy person, I’m going to leave a link for my blog riiiight here. Anyway, since apparently I’m supposed to entertain you fools… What? I’m sorry, did I read that correctly? What did these people ever do for me, why should I do something for them? Simple. Because. I. Want to. Anyway, here’s little story about an average person watching a commercial, versus a person with above average intelligence watching the same commercial.

CommercialHello, are you having a good day? Are you enjoying life?

Average person: Yeah I guess.

Intelligent person: Well, I suppose my day was rather better than usual, I got my paycheck, washed the car, and someone even complimented my hair, but my hair didn’t look particularly good at the time… Perhaps he were making fun of me? Ah well, overall, I’m doing fine

Commercial: “Well, did you know that no one’s life is as good as it could be, unless they have the happy-fier, it’s like a stress ball, but for sadness!”. Clip starts rolling. we walk in on a sad looking man “I-I-I’m  sooo saad…” *covers face, starts crying* a happy-fier pops up in front of him out of no where *Gasps, picks up ball curiously and starts squeezing it slowly* “What is this?” *Squeezing intensifies* “This is amazing! Somehow, I’m not sad anymore! In fact, I’m… Happy!” *Looks at feet, surprised, feet start to smoke* *feet shudder, man blasts off with happiness* Words pop up on screen Buy a happy-fier, It makes you Blast off with happiness! Batteriesnotincluded doesnotcuredeppressionanxiatyorsadnessingeneral sideaffecsmayincludebutarenotlimitedtonauseadizzinessheadachefeveranddeath

Average person: Cool! I’m gonna go out and buy one right now!

Intelligent person: What kind of false advertised rubbish is this? They are purposely targeting naive, weak minded people, and stealing their money! 

I hope you enjoyed my little skit

-Stacy

 

*None of this is meant to be taken offensively, if you do, well then, Fight me! But seriously, lighten up.

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ive been hacked

this is bittersweetlyirrevocable lololololololololololol

 

JAMIE HAS BEEN HACKED HIHI HIHHIHIHIHIHIHI

 

BIGBJINBINGBINGIAJBIAOJGIUBIGBINGBINGIBINGINB

Hey guys it JAhmhhehhhsblohnheh douynysdddd’t know wharfrr  that wahsh hahhbout im agghlhlhh rijght  helpb  HELHP HCEHGHLHGNPGJHJ.JNTHJNhnnhf`1ng2hlt.ciglyuef7r5e64qy5w32x12ew HELP ME PYTLENHGMHAJYTSYJEJYYJTjtyttyjytjjytjy

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How To: Make a How To Post

Hello there, you are a reader, and I am finding out that an intro everyday that starts with Hello blah blah blah… But today I’m here to tell you how to how to!

Step 1: Come up with a concept! Like this one! Only not this one! ITS MINE!

Step 2: Write the Steps! Like these ones! Only not like these ones! THEIR MINE!

Step 3: Make sure to add an excerpt at the end to explain your crazy antics.

Thanks for reading, and yes, I feel your hate, but this post was a joke :D. There will be another one that’s not so weird later today. But remember, I won’t be able to keep up with this everyday schedule for a while because I only have 2 Gigabytes of data on my cellphone.

Continuation of Step 3: Like that one! Only not like that one! THAT ONE IS MINE!

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How To: Increase Your Audience

Hello, im a piece of cheese and YOU’RE reading my post about how to increase your blog’s audience. 
1. Blog about a large range of subjects, but keep it balanced well. It makes sense that gaming bloggers and writing bloggers will have different people reading them right? So if you post about gaming and writing at the same time it’s logical to say that if you can find a way to write about lots of different things then you can greatly expand your amount of readers.

Hmm, do you know any blogger who posts about loads of subjects? Maybe they vary between gaming, his life, writing, and how-to’s? Yea not ringing a bell for me either..

2. The more people you follow, the more follow you people!! Wait what? But seriously, a good way to bring in new people is to explore the blogosphere! Look around your favorite topics for other blogs that talk about the same things you do. Thats how I found a load of you people!!

3. Post often and with quality! If you dont post at least once every two days, then your fans will lose interest! Causing them to unfollow (*^o^*)
Well that concludes our second official How-To post.. I hope you liked it. If not, i’ve got another Adventure To Fate! Battle Arena episode in production stages!

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The Anniversary Of The Blog!

Hello, it’s Riley a.k.a dumcheese.

I started this blog a year ago with one purpose. To entertain people. From writing stories, to blogging my life, to video games, to reviews, to all of that.

This blog is one of the biggest parts of my life. It really means a lot to me and the fact that we just celebrated it’s first full year on WordPress is amazing. I never thought I’d ever have this many followers in one year. I want to thank all of my followers for giving me support, and always liking and commenting. I just want to thank all of you for that.

And to celebrate, I am going to write more comics, more stories, more contests, and more whatever you all want. I am thinking of starting to actually do more of blogging my life. Please reblog and comment on whether I should do more life blogging.

Please everyone comment one question you want to ask me. Whether it be about my life or just some weird chicken or the egg question. I’m open for the questions.

I will do an extra-super special video soon so stay tuned to my channel.

Your friend,
Riley Chapman

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Who Likes This Blog? I Mean If You’re Reading This You Probably Do…

Do you like this blog, love this blog, or think it sucks… VOTE LOVE THIS BLOG! DO IT! NO STOP DRAGGING ME AWAY IM NOT INSANE…