Herro love people, Riley has let me be an author on this wonderful site, which, I may add, I am the top commenter on (riseofthechairs, don’t you dare take my position away lol). And since I am an extremely desperate, needy person, I’m going to leave a link for my blog riiiight here. Anyway, since apparently I’m supposed to entertain you fools… What? I’m sorry, did I read that correctly? What did these people ever do for me, why should I do something for them? Simple. Because. I. Want to. Anyway, here’s little story about an average person watching a commercial, versus a person with above average intelligence watching the same commercial.
Commercial: Hello, are you having a good day? Are you enjoying life?
Average person: Yeah I guess.
Intelligent person: Well, I suppose my day was rather better than usual, I got my paycheck, washed the car, and someone even complimented my hair, but my hair didn’t look particularly good at the time… Perhaps he were making fun of me? Ah well, overall, I’m doing fine
Commercial: “Well, did you know that no one’s life is as good as it could be, unless they have the happy-fier, it’s like a stress ball, but for sadness!”. Clip starts rolling. we walk in on a sad looking man “I-I-I’m sooo saad…” *covers face, starts crying* a happy-fier pops up in front of him out of no where *Gasps, picks up ball curiously and starts squeezing it slowly* “What is this?” *Squeezing intensifies* “This is amazing! Somehow, I’m not sad anymore! In fact, I’m… Happy!” *Looks at feet, surprised, feet start to smoke* *feet shudder, man blasts off with happiness* Words pop up on screen Buy a happy-fier, It makes you Blast off with happiness! Batteriesnotincluded doesnotcuredeppressionanxiatyorsadnessingeneral sideaffecsmayincludebutarenotlimitedtonauseadizzinessheadachefeveranddeath
Average person: Cool! I’m gonna go out and buy one right now!
Intelligent person: What kind of false advertised rubbish is this? They are purposely targeting naive, weak minded people, and stealing their money!
I hope you enjoyed my little skit
*None of this is meant to be taken offensively, if you do, well then, Fight me! But seriously, lighten up.